PODCAST – Episode 1 Taking complete responsibility for our own lives

Welcome to episode 1 of the Go For It Girl Podcast where it’s a non-negotiable for you to live your happiest life. I’m Elaine Park and I’m committed to helping you do this and to start and grow an online business that gives you everything you want.

Today we talk about taking complete responsibility for our own lives in order for it to change and how this is absolute key if we want to lead a happier one. Every action we take causes a reaction, which of course determines whether we have a positive or negative outcome. It’s up to us to decide and make sure that that action we take, comes from the best place possible at the time of that decision, and trying to avoid a ‘shit storm’, (for want of a better phrase) wherever possible.

Now I have an acquaintance on social media and I know her personally. The girl is funny, slim, attractive and can write a great story. She is talented at her job and has 2 gorgeous kids but she lurches from crisis to crisis. I know this because I read her stories most days and whilst some of it is a little hyped up, she has big problems in her life, a lot of them caused by the choices she makes. This comes from the fact that she loves the attention clearly, but I must say, she does it in a way that doesn’t come over as needy. But the ‘subtle’ posts that she puts on are sometimes strategically done in a way that leaves little to the imagination and her constant daily rebel antics just cause her such a lot of unwanted attention. I feel like I want to shake her and say ‘just think about what you’re doing before you do it’ but alas it would fall on deaf ears I’m sure.

I feel that if these type of people just took a step back and made better life choices and thought about something as simple as a facebook post , they wouldn’t have half of the drama that they do in their daily lives. Of course it’s a completely personal choice and sometimes things do happen that are totally out of our control, no matter how hard we try but to the attention seeking people this probably won’t be an option and of course it’s never their fault, when things happen to them.

The fact that we ourselves are energy, we create more of the same of what we are. Choosing to take a positive outlook every day is something that you can control. We all have problems, problems that you may say is nothing to smile about, but dwelling on the problem, no matter how bad, only adds to the magnitude, then the energy given to it snowballs.

My Mum is currently on her 3rd lot of treatment for lung cancer. I have a really bad feeling about the next consultant meeting for the scan results in a couple of weeks, but until that comes and even when it does, I will deal with what’s in front of me on a daily basis. The more I dwell on that problem and bad thoughts swirling in my head, the more I’m consumed and I feel down. This then  takes over my life and relationships. It also means that I don’t want to work or produce content, which leads to more unhappiness and problems. I choose to be happy. Easier said than some days, granted, we all have crap days I know, but I always try to think that If I can’t change it now then I just have to surrender my thoughts. 

When I wake in the morning, I think of 10 things that I am grateful for that day. That I have my health and family, I can work in a business that I love, I have a car to drive, my pets and much more. I do not wake with a cloud over my head of any crap I may have to deal with that day. any of those thoughts that enter, I throw out of my head. We are the thinker of our thoughts and they aren’t reality, only if we make them that way. If it’s something that I don’t want to do, that has to be done, then I suck it up and deal with it in a way that gets me to the other side. Even if it’s a case of making a call and having a conversation, dealing with an email, doing a job, going to an appointment, we have to face it head on then kick it to the curb. It’s the only way that we can move past these obstacles that make us unhappy and yes we’re going to have them constantly throughout live. But if you make it a non-negotiable that problems need to be dealt with then the sooner they’re sorted, the happier we feel and more often than not they’re not as bad as we fear when we get into them.

That being said, if it’s not a necessity, that it’s not something that has to be done and it feels bad or not the right decision, then make the choice to walk away if it keeps your mind in a better place.

The same in our relationships with our Spouse, family members and friends. We often do what’s expected of us to make them feel better. Sometimes they don’t understand our thinking but why would they? They’re not on our journey. Which is why we need to have our ‘Why’ firmly in our mind. What is the purpose for us to do what we do, where are we going . Keep this forefront when things aren’t going our way, at the times when we don’t want to push on. My massive goal that I have helps me to keep moving forward.

I also have a 90 day goal that I want to achieve. Sometimes monetary value or sometimes it’s a project to complete, but I always have one. I then break this down into steps that need to be taken to get there. I don’t worry about tech or how I’m going to get there, I just keep going in the right direction, figuring it out as I go. I find that keeping things as simple as possible, no need to get fancy or be perfect, helps me get it done. Progress then gives satisfaction and confidence, which in turn builds momentum. You see how the power of momentum can then snowball when we get rolling. And that’s the key, get rolling, take action.

So what is the 90 day goal you are going to set yourself. What do you want to achieve in the next 90 days? and what are the steps that you need to take to get there. Break them down, little by little and map out what are the pieces of the journey. Every day do something towards it, even if you can only manage 10 minutes. This is the only way that you are going to change your life to be in line with what you really want, to be happier, and live your best life.

A big part of my business is helping women to start and grow theirs. To have the confidence to know that they can do it and that they don’t have to accept the current salary or situation. It starts with taking care of our needs and knowing what we want to achieve.

You should know that you don’t have to stay in that 9-5 job that you hate, just to pay the bills, just because your friend or suppose says it’s a safe option or because your parents expect you to have a proper job. No, that doesn’t mean that you should go and hand in your notice tomorrow when you have a steady income, that would be daft. But what it does mean is that you have a choice to start doing something that you love, something that drives you to know that you have a purpose, some deeper calling that you may have been feeling. Start putting content out, around your passion, write that blog, start that Podcast or YouTube channel, do those Facebook lives and get on that path to having what you want. Don’t let the thought of not knowing where to start put you off, just make the commitment and we’ll figure it out. If you don’t do it, no ones coming to save you, let me tell you. 

You can be what you want to be, yes I know that sounds like a cliche but it’s true, you just need to start. It starts from being the person you want to be, doing the things you want to do then having the life of your choice and not the other way round. We all say that when I’ve got to this weight, or have this amount in my bank account, well then I’ll be happier. No, start today, changing those thoughts to a person that has the result you want, and the rest will follow. Remember Be Do Have and not the other way round.

Show yourself self love, believe in who you are and be the very best version of yourself. You have to do what it takes because only when you help yourself can you help others. This can be a tough journey but necessary in my opinion.

So I want to hear what your goals are going to be for the next 90 days, what is calling you to start and make a difference? Maybe you’re a Mum with kids ready for back to school, maybe you’ve a career that’s not fulfilling enough, maybe your online business isn’t growing like it should ? or retired with ‘itchy feet’? Whatever your situation, make a commitment today to make your change. A change from how you’re feeling now, and the same as you were 12 months ago.

I want us to get those steps mapped out and break them down to doable chunks with little steps, and I’ll tell you know, come the end of the year, which isn’t far away, you’ll be glad you did. Your new year resolutions will be a whole lot different than they were last year and great change is inevitable. 

Start on your success path today, thanks for listening …

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